Booger Diary

How do you treat your users?

IT Dept.

Do you work IT? If yes, do you treat your users well?

When my coworker is handling users, I have to put my headphones on and drown out the conversation with music. It's not second hand cringe, but second hand shame.

A windows password instructional PNG

After any response from the user, he'll assume they're lying, then ask the same question again but slower; accusatorily and disappointedly.

Then he'll sigh.

Like a long exhale through his nose.

I can't listen to it without wanting to rescue the user.

Information Technology.

I provide a service close to sucking the user's bare ass with a welcoming warm mouth.

Some take the inch and expect nothing more, and others take the mile; I take their inch (penis gay sex joke (It's in there somewhere)). Sometimes they become your parrot, your friend, and your dominatrix all at once.

I get it, having a day where your computer is on the fritz isn't exactly fun, and I will always be there to kiss your booboos, but please know that I'm not your friend.

Treat me like the computer fixing whore that I am - I prefer that; toss me to the side after we're done.

Licking a keyboard

Push me around and stretch my IT hole, see if I care. I'll smile and get you off and online.

Outlook at my face, actively direct your laptop to me, and I can Azure you that everything will be Micrsoft Copilot Adobe Acrobat Onedrive okay!

It's okay, just keep pretending like I didn't just touch your dry cum. I understand.